estranged family members

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BetteTheRed said:
Would divorced lifestyles be among those of which you'd deem sinful?
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Not necessarily.

BetteTheRed said:
Any better than one can recover from being gay?
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We don't mind if people are gay. We don't tell them to recover. We will act in time to stop lifestyles we believe are abhorrent from affecting our parishioners.

And now how off topic are we.
 
Mrs. Anteater, personally I would differentiate between friends breaking up and ongoing relationships and family breaking up.

To not accept a new partner is such abhorrent behavior such as shunning. I wouldn't want that behaviour to influence the vulnerable youth
 
Pinga said:
Mrs. Anteater, personally I would differentiate between friends breaking up and ongoing relationships and family breaking up.

To not accept a new partner is such abhorrent behavior such as shunning. I wouldn't want that behaviour to influence the vulnerable youth
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I agree with that, and then to throw in terms such as home-wrecker? Besides very extreme cases the outsider isn't the one to blame for the breakup of a relationship. The people who make up a relationship are the ones responsible for what goes on with it.
 
ChemGal said:
I agree with that, and then to throw in terms such as home-wrecker? Besides very extreme cases the outsider isn't the one to blame for the breakup of a relationship. The people who make up a relationship are the ones responsible for what goes on with it.
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Certainly, true, I think ,that I expressed that also. I just could think of situations and characters where I also would have a hard time with my siblings and their partners. I.e. If I really liked my brother's wife for her being a deep and kind person, a partner that stood by him, raised his three kids while he persued his career and now where both of them are middle age, he takes off with his secretary because he can't deal with his midlife crisis and the secretary is twenty years younger. Classic example. (Just made up- no clue if this has anything to do with Mr Rae). New wife is superficial and all she can talk about is soap operas and what she spent her money on. Would I embrace her lovingly? I would probably cringe over the table conversation and keep thinking "you are such an idiot, Bro." Of course, every single one involved is responsible for the relationships he/she is having.
 
Pr. Jae said:
Yes, I'm one of those chain-pullers.

However, in this particular case, I'm speaking from experience. Surprisingly, I know what goes on in my church - the church I've been a member of for roughly fifteen years. We warmly welcome everyone when they first come. However, in due time we practice church discipline. We don't want our parishioners to be led astray in their good Christian walks from newcomers who are engaged in lifestyles we believe to be sinful.
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Thank you Jae for being up front and honest in this post, and for admitting that gays or lesbians are not accepted into the fellowship of your church.
 
Metaphor 've estranged: eliminated chits ... and if you refuse chit ... you won't learn of the hidden advantages! thus my*optics ... optional as alternate?
 
Many years ago I had some friends. They split up - and I heard both people's version of the problems. I remain friends with each of them. Not a biggie. Not my job to take sides. Not my responsibility to tell them how to fix it. Not my privilege to assign blame.
 
Some haute couture's ... as they develop are good to observe from afar ... thus avoiding being blinded by the flames ...

@KayTheCurler ... bin there done that! Sometimes a hard pit to get around tho' ...
 
Pits; where concerns for the associated other collapse in excess emotions?

In a recent TED Talk Elizabeth Lev gives a grand talk on the pits of God illustrated on the Sistine Chapel!

Some rye sense of the physical, mental and spiritual (latter two as metaphysical) may be prerequisite ... and supplied by down to earth experience ... bottom line? Isn't that cunning .. perhaps coming attraction when out of the presence of insanity that we observe about us!

It has been expressed that the Doomsday Clock has moved ahead to 3 minutes again ... or we are back on the edge of existence due to lack of balance ... Elizabeth being under lye-NG! A dark message not for the super fish all ... Wahls as fabrics of imagination? One has to know where they're at in the plot ... a great conspiracy? Thus a sense of 10 saur develops; direct-I've, or Eve in the Shadow?
 
Pr. Jae said:
Actually Seeler, that isn't what I said.
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True. They would be quite welcome as long as they didn't act like gays and lesbians. A single gay man could quite comfortably fit in until the first time he brought a boyfriend to church (or even ran into a member on the street while on a date). At least that is how I read your response. And that is why I would encourage any LGBT folks church-hunting to look elsewhere. There are plenty of churches that will accept them for who they are without requiring that they keep that part of their life "in the closet".
 
Pr. Jae said:
Actually Seeler, that isn't what I said.
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I realize that isn't your exact words. Perhaps if they pretended to be strait, and lived a lie - especially if they confessed their sin (of loving one another) and repented - the welcome would be extended. But just wait until they sit with their arms across each others shoulders, or give each other a peck on the cheek, or inquire about getting married (or let it be known that they are married), or adopt a child -- No your response makes it perfectly clear to me that, if I were a gay person, I would not be genuinely welcomed, affirmed, appreciated, respected, or loved.
 
Jae can't hear himself ... has no inclinations to OBI .. under Exclusion Prin. ... one observes outside the subjective state ... if close to the objective of Erse ... you could be on edge as in NDE!

It can be dissonant or bring on Eris ... like Noah's daughters after the flood of alternate awareness or the stunning booty's ... much whine was inclusive ...

Almost like that Naughty Lady of Shady Lain ... that Mac Shirley attribute ... her best work she claimed was Never on Sundays ... possibly on a dark Dais as Je Ani 've Ark!

Such things drive professional academics batty ... as they like things nailed and onyx 'd ...

You know the label on that Mongolian Mule?
 
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I think that Jae is free to do as he sees fit.
We often seem to be brow beating him

As he has presented his brother to us, he is a married man who is living with another woman

Personally that is not fair to either woman.

If you no longer love your wife, then move out, move on, get a divorce which allows her to also move on, socially and legally.

To simply live with someone else is also not fair to that woman. It feels like a half hearted commitment

Of course we dont know the details either. But i wouldnt be terribly comfortable knowing that my brother was keeping two women on the hook either
 
Does nature allow action-reaction? If no reaction is un natural should we expecting nothing ... get out of natural reality and into the abstract?

Thus outliers beyond the horizon --- James Hilton! Thought is kind've a myth to those expecting only emotional input ...

One has to be a kind of Miss Terre Inbetween to be beyond the polity at either extreme ...

Some say it is a thin red era ...
 
Seeler said:
I realize that isn't your exact words. Perhaps if they pretended to be strait, and lived a lie - especially if they confessed their sin (of loving one another) and repented - the welcome would be extended. But just wait until they sit with their arms across each others shoulders, or give each other a peck on the cheek, or inquire about getting married (or let it be known that they are married), or adopt a child -- No your response makes it perfectly clear to me that, if I were a gay person, I would not be genuinely welcomed, affirmed, appreciated, respected, or loved.
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No lie need be made Seeler. Their stance could be a very honest, "Gay but celibate." You don't see celibacy as a lie do you Seeler?
 
Pr. Jae said:
No lie need be made Seeler. Their stance could be a very honest, "Gay but celibate." You don't see celibacy as a lie do you Seeler?
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It means being unable to express who you are on a very profound level (sexually with a consenting partner). It is not a lie per se, but it is an imposition that need not be there and lying would likely happen as they "fell off the wagon" now and then. Just look at how well celibacy has worked for the RCs. If a gay person really wants to go to your church, they are welcome to it, but I could not fathom why they would.
 
Mendalla said:
It means being unable to express who you are on a very profound level (sexually with a consenting partner). It is not a lie per se, but it is an imposition that need not be there and lying would likely happen as they "fell off the wagon" now and then. Just look at how well celibacy has worked for the RCs. If a gay person really wants to go to your church, they are welcome to it, but I could not fathom why they would.
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Mendalla, a person can live and live well without expressing themselves sexually. Jesus went his whole life long without ever having sex. I myself lived a rich celibate life until I was 44, and would have contentedly continued to do so if it had been God's will. Surely you don't mean to suggest that gays and lesbians can't have as much resolve as I did.
 
Lastpointe said:
I think that Jae is free to do as he sees fit.
We often seem to be brow beating him

As he has presented his brother to us, he is a married man who is living with another woman

Personally that is not fair to either woman.

If you no longer love your wife, then move out, move on, get a divorce which allows her to also move on, socially and legally.

To simply live with someone else is also not fair to that woman. It feels like a half hearted commitment

Of course we dont know the details either. But i wouldnt be terribly comfortable knowing that my brother was keeping two women on the hook either
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Lastpointe - the shoe could be on the other foot in my daughter's case. She and R... were married with two children. They expected it to last forever. But there were pressures - his former relationship and their child together; illness, difficulties with the children, finances. Too much stress. Eventually the marriage broke down - they continued to live together for another year or two, perhaps hoping that things would improve. But it didn't happen. They agreed to join custody for the children, and she moved out.
Just when she first met P.... I don't know but six months or so after her moving out of the house (and two years after the marriage was over for all intents and purposes) she moved in with P...
I think that R... still may have hoped that she might sometime come back - I know that, even though the kids liked P... and he provided a good home for them, the kids hoped that their parents could be reunited. Although they remained cordial and cooperated in matters concerning the kids and the dog, rebuilding the marriage just wasn't going to happen.

Eventually R... moved on to a new relationship. They reached a legal settlement with regard to property.
As far as I know they have not divorced - I don't know why.
Neither is looking to reconcile. The kids have accepted the fact that they have two homes -- Mom & P... and Dad & his live-in friend.

I seldom see R... except occasionally when he drops off Grandson. When we do meet we are friendly and courteous. I gladly dogsat for him at one time, and have let him know that I would again. I still get a Christmas card from one of his relatives. His brother's wife came home from Alberta and made a point of spending a day with my daughter and the children.

I suppose you could say that my daughter is married to one man and living with another. I don't see that she is keeping either or both on the hook.
 
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