estranged family members

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Waterfall said:
I agree with revjohn, but might I suggest, pick one thing for now and focus on doing that for now. Then add another, as you regain your strength. So if you missed church, maybe your one thing could be to go to the support group tonight, even if your body attends and your mind is somewhere else, you can just sit and listen. Would your friend go with you?
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I think she has other plans but I can ask. She lives a separate life from me mostly - the single and dating life which I am not ready to venture into, not into it, and have no money for going out to pubs and restaurants and stuff- unless we're at home.
 
Awww, Kimmio, I feel for you. I wish life didn't dish out such pain, and I wish relationships were forever. But that's not the way it is, so all I can offer is that virtual hug that was mentioned before. Please take care of yourself: You are sooo worth it!
 
Well I received an e-mail from my middle child this week.( From a guerrilla do not respond address) It asked me to forward it to my youngest. It said she was ok. She was out of touch for a variety of reasons. It wasn't his fault and don't do anything stupid.

So now I am very worried about my youngest. I have been away for a week.Before I left he said he might go away for a few days-I said let me know so we could get a cat sitter. The day I was driving to the airport I got a call from him. He wanted to leave that evening. I gave him some names to call for sitters but then called my quilting friend who the cat like. Yes she could do it. Called back and he said great.
Now I'm home and he isn't. He's 20 but is struggling with depression and anxiety.
I think he went to a nearby city-with twins he has traveled with before. I'm not sure. I had expected a note or an indication on calendar when he's be home. I called a co-worker as he boys chum around with the other 2 and mine. Their number has been change.
My son, D, does not have a working cell phone. He broke it and turned down my offer to get him a new one for his birthday.

So part of me feels dumb not having confirmed with him who he was going with and for how long.

And I worry about him and suicide.
But he took his antidepressants with him (but it his healthcare and learners license and bank cards are in his room) He probably took cash-there is an uncashed cheque here too)

And so after one bad night of crying(on my way home) I push these thoughts away.

But I wonder-what is a reasonable time before I do more? Safeway will know the last name-and a number-for one of the boys I think he is with.
 
Oh Tabitha what a worry. About your youngest and your middle. Does your son have enough money to be away for 10 days? I don't see any harm in asking some of his friends. I am sending strength to you.
 
No I actually asked E if he was FB friends(he's not but was going to send a request)-and just said I wasn't sure when D would be back. I don't want to worry him. I just did a FB search uner my real name-and under my fake profile I use to see my middle's page-and I could not find his page.
Kimmio-I could ask at Safeway-but I'm a bit too hesitant just yet.
D is mostly a recluse-and really does not have other friends that I know to check with.
He does have a mental health counsellor-and I'm sure one letter on the table is from her-but know I don't know her name.
He has been seeing our GP lately-he might know counsellor's name -but at 20 I don't have parental rights for information.

I did send a message to both e-mails I have for D.
 
I might just call the police non emergency line and ask if they think you need their help to find him- I don't think they have to wait three days or whatever it is, to look for him if they agree he's at higher risk. It wouldn't hurt anyone to ask. It's totally understandable that you are worried.
 
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no to friend who came in to feed cat she did not see him at all.. I assume he left the day he was going to. Darn it all-I don't even know the twins new vehicle I did know their old one. (and actually have a photo of one of them and D in it on my Ipad)
 
How long have you been home? Do you know their parents, or their parents' names to try to call them?


He could just have not felt he needed that stuff, or forgot it, and is totally fine, but I understand your worry.
 
Tabitha said:
No I actually asked E if he was FB friends(he's not but was going to send a request)-and just said I wasn't sure when D would be back. I don't want to worry him. I just did a FB search uner my real name-and under my fake profile I use to see my middle's page-and I could not find his page.
Kimmio-I could ask at Safeway-but I'm a bit too hesitant just yet.
D is mostly a recluse-and really does not have other friends that I know to check with.
He does have a mental health counsellor-and I'm sure one letter on the table is from her-but know I don't know her name.
He has been seeing our GP lately-he might know counsellor's name -but at 20 I don't have parental rights for information.

I did send a message to both e-mails I have for D.
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You could call the GP's office on Monday and explain the situation to him/her and ask if s/he thinks you should contact the police. That way she is not breaking confidentiality and you have a hint of how concerned you should be. Also 20 year old boys do dumb things without thinking about others (my nephew is 21 now and is a good kid but sometimes very clueless about other people).

Do you know the name of the twins he might be with? I'm wondering if you could look at their FB pages and see if there are any pictures, etc
 
Justme said:
You could call the GP's office on Monday and explain the situation to him/her and ask if s/he thinks you should contact the police. That way she is not breaking confidentiality and you have a hint of how concerned you should be. Also 20 year old boys do dumb things without thinking about others (my nephew is 21 now and is a good kid but sometimes very clueless about other people).

Do you know the name of the twins he might be with? I'm wondering if you could look at their FB pages and see if there are any pictures, etc
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That's true, too. It's likely that. But I am a worrier...I'd be feeling the same way as you, Tabitha.
 
I also understand that you don't want to over-react. Thinking of you, and I hope you hear from him, or get to speak to someone who knows something that'll put your mind at ease, soon.
 
Do you know why your middle is so worried?

I think I would contact police sooner than later.

But I worry so what do I know.
 
So I went to Safeway to grab a few groceries (it's a food store for those of you who don't have them nearby). I spoke with A (who has the same name As One of the twins A and A). He hasn't heard anything. Last time he heard from D was for his own bday. I explained about the broken phone. He's going to text A-who has quit to move to nearby city (well 2 hours away-which is where I think D went). I said just ask D to call home. D does know both land line and cell numbers. I just said D left for holidays while I was away and I wanted to know when he'd be back.
No I don't know twins last names but could try FB. (or go back and ask this A-who will know. Waiting to Mon. is reasonable.
It's a big festival in town this weekend.

So I've casually put the word out.
 
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