Unsupervised children

[Seeler]

I'm wondering at what age you consider appropriate for children to be unsupervised, when and where?

This has come up on facebook several times recently. Parents have been arrested and children put, temporarily, in foster care because the children have been permitted to go to a nearby playground alone.

Over forty years ago, we moved to a new city. I took my five year old son to public school kindergarden the first day and asked what time I should return for him and was told that school-aged children were expected to walk (three blocks with a crossing guard at the street corner) by themselves. Since he was new, she would pair him with another child for the first week. I think now that would get me arrested.

Not long ago an acquaintence told me that someone had knocked on her door to let her know that her two girls (aged 7 and 9) were playing on the front lawn - apparently this person thought that she didn't know her children were outside.

Two extremes.

Are there any laws, or guidelines, as to when children can do things unsupervised, like:

riding their bikes around the neighbourhood?
walking to and from school?
playing outside on their own block?
going to the park, swimming pool, or playground less than a klm away from home?
being on their own at the mall (while Mom gets groceries)?
taking a city bus to the mall?

 

[Seeler]

I could list a lot more activities - like exploring in the fields and woods of a rural area, or large city park?
walking around a beaver-pond or going fishing in a brook?
or whatever?

Does knowing where your kid is (Mike went on a hike back to the old mill with Jim and Fred) constitute supervision?
If your kid is out playing road-hockey on the cul-de-sac a block away mean that you can run up to the corner store, or over to the neighbour's for a coffee, or do you have to be at home so he'll know where you are at all times?

 

[ChemGal]

There are no set age laws here, it's just what's reasonable based on the situation, child's maturity, etc. For rules, the only things I can think of are the members lake and swimming pools.

I walked to kindergarten. I would meet up with friends half-way. Most kids were bused, and they had guards to ensure all of the young kids were on the right one, so we had our own crossing guard, for 4 of us I think it was. She would get us across the busy street at the school, but that was it besides the few times she was nice and had free time and would walk part way with us.

We used to go to the park alone right from when we moved into my parents' current house - before starting grade 2. I was quite a bit older - jr. high before being allowed to go to the largest urban park, and never by myself - even now my mom wouldn't want me there by myself. Too many coyotes along with the possible bear or whatever as well as the safety issue with other people in a wooded area.

Kids here still walk too, although there are quite a few parents who drop off/walk with them/groups of kids walk together.

My street has 2 parks, one is big, it's rare I see kids alone there. The other is small, and quite often there are kids there without an adult, usually they are just a few houses away.

 

[Boots]

Home alone courses start at age 7 but can not be left home alone with any siblings unless the oldest sibling is 11.

Babysitting courses start at age 11 or 12. This being said there are time lines as well.

Currently I can leave my children home alone but not together home alone. Child A can stay home alone without Child B and vise versa but, Child A and Child B cannot be left home alone together.

 

[Seeler]

Boots - that doesn't make sense. But then, lots of laws don't make sense. I don't remember the ages of your boys (I think they were toddlers when we first met on WC1). My kids were less than 13 months apart so, if I understand you right, at age nine or ten I could have left one or the other alone for a short period of time - but not together?? So both kids are playing with neighbourhood kids in the cul-de-sac in front of our house - and I decide that I have to run to the store - I have to take one with me? But if one is playing road-hockey and the other is on the neighbour's deck playing dolls with their daughter it would be ok?
I lived in southern Ontario when my kids were little. My understanding of the law at that time was that it depended on the parents' judgment of the maturity of the child. No law that said they had to be a certain age. But it was also generally understood that if something happened to a child under twelve who was home alone or unsupervised, the law or social services might consider it neglect. It was kind of a grey area.
Someone could back over a kid riding his bike on the sidewalk just as easily while you are in the house cooking his lunch as when you can't be located because you've run up to the store.

 

[Boots]

If I or my husband need to run out and there is no adult in the neighbourhood kind enough to supervise child B when were are away then he comes with.

He finds this unfair because Child A gets to stay home and play video games and he has to come do somthing boring.

Child B also understands that beacuse Child A is older Child A is able to do more things.

Sometimes we insist that both children come with us and sometimes we leave B and take A.

When we take B he always gets a treat.

 

[Carolla]

I can't really answer your questions Seeler - I'm out of that 'stage' bracket for parenting and/or grandparenting. In the end, I think parents use their own judgement most of the time. Some sibs get along fine & are attentive & responsive to each other so can be left alone ... others not so much.

There's the sad case in the news today of a bunch of kids playing out in a cornfield yesterday - and all of them coming in, absent a 2 year old who has been lost at least overnight. I haven't heard an update recently ... hopefully the child will soon located and okay. Kids sometimes just get busy being kids & having so much fun that they forget, or assume others have charge of the little ones. So - stuff happens.

Addendum: happily, the little girl was found safe later today, having spent the night in the corn & eventually wandering into a bean field where she was more easily spotted.

 

[Beloved]

Thank goodness she was found, Carolla - how scary for her loved ones at the time.