estranged family members

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I think this may happen more often than folks think.

An old friend was visiting the other night, and advised that one of her relatives that I knew married someone (sense the family wasn't happy with the person), and then moved west, and has not been heard of since.
 
Tabitha said:
In my case I have evidence she is alive-contacting the university fulfilled that. In Jae's case his brother has a wife I assume-and a job.. I Not being in contact does not make one "missing".
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My brother has a wife, but they are separated. She's a friend of mine, and she hears from him every couple of months or so.
 
MrsAnteater said:
Not that I want to scare anybody- but I wonder, if nobody has any contact- at which point do you declare someone a missing person?
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Depends.

If they are a dependent and have not checked in for 24 hours when they otherwise might have Police will start a search.
If they are a dependent and have not checked in for 24 hours after saying they might not see your for a week or so because they are going camping with friends then Police will typically suggest you call them back should the dependent ever become overdue.
If they are independent the police will want to know what your relationship is to the individual. If you don't have much of one the police might consider you constantly asking to look into it a nuisance.

For example. I haven't heard from an ex-girlfriend for 24 years now. Police aren't much interested in turning that into a missing persons search and if they did I think it would be a given that I wouldn't be hearing from that ex-girlfriend for another 24 years or so.

With Siblings or Parents you actually need to have some rationale for why you think they might be missing.

Regular contact at regular intervals.

Failure of others to hear from the same individual.
 
I'm not in the phonebook. I have a cell phone and just lately got a landline-but it is through shaw. If jae's brother is with the government there is usually a listing of staff available on line. (after having to keep track of ex-husband for child support etc).
 
Tabitha said:
I'm not in the phonebook. I have a cell phone and just lately got a landline-but it is through shaw. If jae's brother is with the government there is usually a listing of staff available on line. (after having to keep track of ex-husband for child support etc).
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Highly doubtful that there would be an online listing for his particular department Tabitha, but thank you for the idea. I will look into that.
 
Maybe CH could ask to become facebook friends with him.
Does he have any hobbies ie stamp collecting, banjo playing, square dancing that might lead to a club he attends?
I assume he was raised in the united church. Any chance he is active in one?
 
I don't know what level of government he is in or what department but for the feds you can often figure out someone's email address.

For example if someone's name was: David Gordon Jones and he worked at Health Canada his email would likely be:

david.jones@hc-sc.gc.ca

or if there was more than one David Jones:

david.g.jones@hc-sc.gc.ca or david.gordon.jones@hc-sc.gc.ca

or dave.jones@hc-sc.gc.ca

there is a naming convention with the federal government so it is usually first name followed by a dot followed by last name @department's initials in both languages.gc.ca (for right now - this will change in 2016). There are some differences for example CFIA is inspection.gc.ca (because inspection is the same word in English and French) you can figure it out by going to the department's website.

You won't get a return email if you have the wrong email address (usually) because it was wreaking havoc on government systems when people tried to spam (it may have changed though).
 
Apparently my brother is no longer in Saskatchewan, nor working for the government. Mom tells me he has accepted an unknown job in Edmonton, Alberta.
 
Tabitha said:
well we do have wc2 folks in Edmonton. When was your Mom last in contact with him?
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At Christmastime. We know he got the job in Edmonton because he texted one of my sisters. That's all he said though - he got the job and it's in Edmonton. No mention of company, etc.
 
so it's about 8 weeks since your family last heard from him. Your sister has his phone number-if he texted her.

Perhaps you could get his number from your sister and text him with your new ap.

If his birthday is soon you could wish him a happy day-or even just say you were thinking of him on family day!
 
Tabitha said:
so it's about 8 weeks since your family last heard from him. Your sister has his phone number-if he texted her.

Perhaps you could get his number from your sister and text him with your new ap.

If his birthday is soon you could wish him a happy day-or even just say you were thinking of him on family day!
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Good thinking Tabitha, I'll ask my sister, although I don't know if she kept his number or not. His birthday is in late March, so that would be a good reason to call :)
 
or call sooner-if you are missing him One of the oscar winners said to call your parents and talk as long as they want. You could just call your brother and chat. And then repeat monthly!
 
so my sister did e-mail me-and her daughter added a paragraph-aproved by my middle one
They in school. They are happy. They are about to move in with a friend. School is almost done.-no word on future plans ie after University

Sister and niece did not want to break their "precarious thread of communication" by telling me before trip.. (But somehow thought they could tell my parents and other sister?)

I did respond back and say that yes the visit was a good thing, I appreciated the update. I kept my e-mail short.

In reality my heart is still hemorrhaging as a part of it is missing. I also feel I need to watch what I say to my sister as my trust has been broken.

I'm also experiencing some depression at the moment, and am concentrating on doing things that make me feel good
 
Hugs Tabitha as you continue to care for yourself in this difficult season.
 
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