Agnosticism, atheism, and "spiritual struggle"

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About fear… the Bible says we shouldn’t fear. Yet, even Jesus would’ve felt enormous fear. The only way one cannot feel it is if they have a very dark personality disorder or if they can tap into some kind of ecstatic state of mind through prayer or meditation or trance (or drugs) of some kind (which might explain Trump and some of his supporters). That leaves most of us with a natural state of fear when there are things in life that feel threatening. Some, have a stronger propensity for it due to neurological variances. If there’s a God, we were made to have those differences. We were made with those differences regardless of belief. The idea of a utilitarian utopia isn’t so appealing when one realizes that counts most of us out for having imperfections in body and mind - they’re differences that were meant to be. I don’t believe in a perfect human race. We’re meant to be imperfect. We’re meant to learn. What a boring life if we were born knowing everything. I believe in a level playing field organized through thoughtful, caring and fair systems. Agnostic Christian Humanist?

Religion and paganism (currently Eurocentric paganism in particular but may find common ground with even harsh aspects of even older traditions) can both be manipulated to serve harsh authoritarian and utilitarian systems. They are now. I think there was some kind of deliberate “toxic propaganda leak” if you will, through internet influences going back several years. Part of the whole “red pilling” phenomenon. I think a lot of mainstream folks who dabble in either religion or paganism, or several beliefs, might as well add belief in aliens to that, especially on the west coast - but aren’t too committed - have not yet realized the propaganda streams they could be carried down if not careful. Thinking of Victoria Beckham in an interview I read saying her children keep crystals by their beds - this is the tip of the iceberg if people don’t pay attention to what follows in their algorithms. Things like that, that used to seem harmless could be used as hooks. Once you see it you can’t unsee it but good luck getting support for that realization - people just kind get funneled in a direction.
 
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Even if one is aware of these forces it’s easy for them to become normalized after a while as they seep in everywhere. Red pill/ blue pill is now common lexicon.

And there’s beauty in imperfection. Perfect automatons seem to be missing something for their perfection - it’s actually kind of toxic.
 
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There’s also strong atheist technocracy that is also toxic and, oddly, fits with the other religious and pagan streams, geopolitically - if, at times, only as a means for powers to divide and conquer. Again, I think the main sources of propaganda are rooted in the same intentions of authoritarian hegemonic control - just different “flavours”.
 
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