Perimenopause Sucks

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Sleep disturbances, sweating (wondering if I'm feverish, but no it's hormonal), headaches and nausea that feel like peoples' description of morning sickness though I have never experienced the real thing, irregular periods along with unpredictable PMS symptoms, boobs hurt, bloating and weight gain - clothes feel tight from one day to the next, face looks fat, fatigue, mood swings, extra anxiety... It sucks! And it can go on for years - there's no way to know for sure. Did anyone else have a difficult time going through this? Some days it feels like I'm dying or losing my mind! Then the next day I'm fine...it's a roller coaster!
 
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BetteTheRed

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That does sound a little excessive, although I confess that I still get plenty of flashes and night sweats, even now. You dress in layers. Lots of cotton and merino.

If I were you, I'd go to your doc; they might suggest hormone therapy.

And there are natural products. Some women are helped by chaste-tree berry, wild yam seems to have some hormone balancing effects, raspberry leaf is always good. I used a product called "Estroven" to some success; I also tried a wyrd herbal cream that worked amazingly, but was far too expensive to maintain...
 
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That does sound a little excessive, although I confess that I still get plenty of flashes and night sweats, even now. You dress in layers. Lots of cotton and merino.

If I were you, I'd go to your doc; they might suggest hormone therapy.

And there are natural products. Some women are helped by chaste-tree berry, wild yam seems to have some hormone balancing effects, raspberry leaf is always good. I used a product called "Estroven" to some success; I also tried a wyrd herbal cream that worked amazingly, but was far too expensive to maintain...
I don't get all the symptoms everyday, but almost everyday, I have at least one of them to contend with.

I don't think it's safe for me to go on hormones now - my doc and I discussed that last year - but I am going to try the natural stuff and see if it helps at all, even a little. He actually told me to up my B vitamin intake - and I was but I then ran out and didn't buy more of what I was using. I'll buy more of that too.

My mom said she had hot flashes and sweats for over 20 years. She reached full menopause younger than I am now. She certainly had daily, more than daily mood swings - I remember. Some of them were funny. Particularly the time I was late for dinner. She had kept take out Chinese food in the oven. The lid on the rice burned and she served it with the burnt paper bits in it and said "I don't care. You will eat it anyway!" lots of door slamming. Good times.

I just try to avoid people - I get more in weepy mode - can't help myself from crying over stupid things (in retrospect they usually aren't worth crying about but the tears are close to the surface) and nobody likes that.
 
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If I laughed out loud at some of her behaviour I would've been turned into fried green tomatoes in short order, though, I'm pretty sure. Friends were over for some of it, and still bring it up.
 

Waterfall

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I never had hot flashes but I did get extremely "bitchy" around my periods....and then it would just stop until the next period.....it did take me awhile to realize it was related to perimenopause.
I eventually had to give the household a "heads up" and a warning.....everyone steered clear of me. lol!
 
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I never had hot flashes but I did get extremely "bitchy" around my periods....and then it would just stop until the next period.....it did take me awhile to realize it was related to perimenopause.
I eventually had to give the household a "heads up" and a warning.....everyone steered clear of me. lol!
Lol. I've always been a little extra bitchy around my periods. This is worse - I feel like crying suddenly over spilled milk and just generally feel "yuck" and I do find others' habits - like the habit of saying "good morning!" when I am in no mood to greet the morning, extra irritating. If you can relate. I don't want to talk in the morning. Chipper morning people have always annoyed me - because I have not been one since I was a teen - but not enough for me to want to totally avoid them. I used to be able to fake it through the morning. I can't lately. I'm just grumpy and that's the way it is.
 
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GO3838

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Did anyone else have a difficult time going through this? Some days it feels like I'm dying or losing my mind! Then the next day I'm fine...it's a roller coaster!
Sympathies, Kimmio. I went through 8 years of perimenopause, and now I'm in the final stretches of menopause.

It's no picnic: I dreaded the heavy bleeds, and having to stash extra clothes in my locker at work. I muttered obscenities while cleaning up
trails of blood off the floor at 3:00 am before any of my family saw it. I would bloat up like the Michelin Man. And it seemed to me that my family became overly sensitive during my period (Of course, that was my mood swings affecting them.)

I never took hormones. I would pray, listen to my favourite music, go for walks and putter around the garden in summer. In winter, I'd watch "Call the Midwife" and blame the tears on the show, but I'd feel better after a good cry brought on by "Call the Midwife."

When I couldn't sleep, I'd get out one of those "adult colouring books" of intricate geometric designs and colour until I felt sleepy.

And I'm very lucky to have a husband who loved my body even on the days that I couldn't.

It's a difficult time, but you will get through it.
 

paradox3

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There were those times of overheating . . . but no worse than I experienced during pregnancy.

"Hot flashes" were actually a blessing to me. I have been known to blush pretty badly on occasion with much the same overheating sensation.

It was most convenient to blame blushing and sweating on a "hot flash" even if I knew anxiety was at the root of it. :D

And of course, having the "hot flash" to blame made me worry less about blushing & consequently I blushed less.

The real hot flashes were triggered by coffee, I recall. Perimenopause let me off pretty easy.

P.S. I loved Call the Midwife. What a great series!
 
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I’ve had about enough of it. I identified it about a year ago but suspected I was entering that phase before that...blood tests/ doc said hormones were normal for my age, which includes hormones of a woman in perimenopause. Mid forties is not an abnormal time for it to start, considering my mom was all over and done with everything by her mid forties (a bit early). I hope, in a few years, by the time I am near 50, it will be over. I suspect my perimenopause started around 40 and has just become more disruptive year by year. Maybe it’s the grande finale - but I don’t know. I wish it was by now. I don’t like aging, otherwise, I don’t like looking middle aged/ older it depresses me - who is that person who looks too much like my mother, with the frumpy old face and puffy body? is what I think when I look in the mirror now - but I would be fine with my periods being over for good. That would be an aging thing that would not upset me.
 
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Hah, mine came to an abrupt end with pelvic radiation.

Be careful what you wish for
True enough.

If I have to go 8 years like this it’s going to drive me around the bend, though. I have too many (unpaid) sick days from it, too. I have a great employer - and if it’s around once a month they likely get it. I have discussed it with female supervisors. They are the most flexible workplace ever. Probably because there are times we have no work for weeks at a time, then gangbusters, then another lag. They’re flexible and they keep those who do good work whenever we’re there...and, though there are not too many things i’m good at, my job is one thing I am really good at so they don’t want to lose me, and will accommodate. But I have so many separate health complaints it adds up to one big daily pain.
 

Mrs.Anteater

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Mood swings was the worst of it. In general, I decided to ignore it mostly, just notice and then let it go. The night sweats worried me first ( do I have cancer??), but then I saw my naturopath about food sensitivities and with diet change it significantly affected the night sweats. I think, diet does make a big difference.
I only worried after I was already in menopause and then started to bleed again a couple of times ( in a time of stress) , which needed to be checked by the gyn but ended up being harmless.
I always used to be cold and wear socks in bed except for in August. Now, I don’t need to and stick my feet out from under the blankets to cool off. Not a bad result. Don’t miss having to deal with periods at all.
I would think my peri phase was about two years.
 
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Thing is...with mobility issues, i can’t let it go. Hormonal symptoms just exacerbate the preexisting difficulties. I already have muscle stiffness and pain,and I could do without this. I hate being hyper aware of everything I feel in my body all the time. Before i needed mobility aids, I could ignore PMS. But now it’s likely to make me even clumsier.

I’m just ranting...as I feel a hot flash coming on.o_O

(Hey off topic, admins...Where’s the blue frustrated/ confused face smiley? That was probably my favourite one! It was less intense than :mad:)
 

Mendalla

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I think this:unsure: was intended as the replacement but it doesn't really do it, does it? It's more a thinking about it smiley. There are myriad options for adding smileys so I will look for a better one.
 

Carolla

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One day at a time Kimmio. No point adding to your discomfort with disparaging thoughts. Of course it's no fun, but as my mom used to say (about many things! wise woman that she was) "this too shall pass". Hang in there girl - and get some pretty new nightgowns! I sure ended up with a stack of those, because sometimes a change was needed part way through the night. Now I need the cozy ones ... hormones where are you when I need you??
 

BetteTheRed

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And despite the fact that peri-menopause can last a few years, it's a vast improvement on a sudden, surgical menopause. THAT one will throw most women into a serious loop; it's nasty and I'm glad it didn't happen to me.
 

GO3838

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I'm down to a period about every 4 months, and when I do get one it's only a few drops.
And now that I'm not losing so much blood, my hemoglobin level is higher.
I keep hoping each unenthusiastic period I have is going to be the last, but I know I'll get there eventually.......

In the meantime, I try to remember that there are so many women worse off than me.
 
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So, do periods normally go haywire, I.e. longer and shorter cycles all over the place, then get further apart? It feels like I either have my period, or feel like it’s coming, all the time! Until recently, they were still every 28 days, but I started getting hot flashes - but I didn’t realize what they were at first - and extra moodiness and more pms bloating over a year ago. Also, nausea and headaches especially the day before and/ or first day of my period, with the usual cramps just before, and on day 1. And the periods are shorter but heavier, with, it seems, usually less time between them. I’ve had flooding, but usually it’s just heavier than it used to be on the first day. A few months ago, it was a week late, then the next two were about a week early.
 
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