Successful PArent???
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ChemGal
One with keen eye
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- She/Her/Her
Like Pinga said though, it depends on the person. One of my sister's inlaws really doesn't have the mental development to become employed, he is adopted (similar cultures as far as I know). I don't think that's something the adoptive parents could have really done more. More stimulation at a younger age would have been more beneficial, not sure even with the best possible interventions if employment would have been within his potential.
Mrs.Anteater
Just keep going....
I know of a family that has a house full of adopted and foster kids, all with some kind of disability. They are amazing. Usually, they know more than our experienced OT and its a pleasure to work with them.
Pinga
Room for All
@Mrs.Anteater - in the case of the family that I know, they also knew the system quite well. They were excellent advocates for the children in their care, often tireless in ensuring they received the support that they needed.
BetteTheRed
Resident Heretic
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I found parenting a huge challenge, and although I rose to it to the best of my ability, I made many errors. Some of it because of addiction, a lot of it because of exhaustion. My children know that I did the best with the tools that I had at the time. Judging me would not be a helpful reaction, nor would it improve our relationships, which are actually pretty good.
Mental health issues cut a wide and deep swath through my family. My mother was classically type I bipolar, my father had PTSD that presented as alcoholism. My late ex-husband's family is a minefield of early onset dementia on one side, and (often hospitalized) borderline personality, with a huge instance of alcoholism, on the other. My children, none of them, escaped scot-free.
As for successful? Well, I dunno. My son is a homeless itinerant artist/poet who lives on Salt Spring Island. My daughter has achieved independence in the past, but is currently living with me while she finishes a civil engineering diploma from the local community college (she was something of a "late bloomer" to academia; a very bright child, she attended three different high schools over four years achieving a total of 1/2 credit - in Civics, of course...).
Mental health issues cut a wide and deep swath through my family. My mother was classically type I bipolar, my father had PTSD that presented as alcoholism. My late ex-husband's family is a minefield of early onset dementia on one side, and (often hospitalized) borderline personality, with a huge instance of alcoholism, on the other. My children, none of them, escaped scot-free.
As for successful? Well, I dunno. My son is a homeless itinerant artist/poet who lives on Salt Spring Island. My daughter has achieved independence in the past, but is currently living with me while she finishes a civil engineering diploma from the local community college (she was something of a "late bloomer" to academia; a very bright child, she attended three different high schools over four years achieving a total of 1/2 credit - in Civics, of course...).
Mrs.Anteater
Just keep going....
If one looks at all the stories one hears when meeting people over the years, I would say that humans do have an ingrown skill of surviving and making the best of it. I would say that family, community and friends are playing a big role in this and in todays time, we might be forgetting that we are all depending on each other.
Pinga
Room for All
@BetteTheRed - I am guessing your honesty and humility had a lot to do with it. It is good to figure out how to make it work.
BetteTheRed
Resident Heretic
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In my youth, we tried to hide all this crap and dysfunction. It was not very successful, and no-one knew you needed support. The less work you do, from a psycho-spiritual POV, the more you just dump on your progeny....
I would share some of my experiences on the dark side ... however many theologians tell me my experiences were not real that they were all in my mind ... the mind should be preserved?
And of course we all know that mind/soul/psyche complex is just essence and not physical ... and thus we could be unknown if we don't accept such essences ... can we learn to know such essence? Gestalt ... a stopped theory!
Whispers in the pynes ...
And of course we all know that mind/soul/psyche complex is just essence and not physical ... and thus we could be unknown if we don't accept such essences ... can we learn to know such essence? Gestalt ... a stopped theory!
Whispers in the pynes ...
That may be hard to accept for some confused over the subjective-objective of the other shue ...