How was your wedding?

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Mrs.Anteater

Just keep going....
Weddings come in all forms and sizes, with and without catastrophes.
How was yours?
And- would you do it again that way?
 
I was in my third month of ( planned) pregnancy at my wedding. My mother had sewn me a skirt which I was wearing with a silken blouse. We went to the justice of peace in the town hall. In Germany, people don’t have bridesmaids or such, there is a “ witness” for the groom and a “ witness “ for the bride to sign the certificate.
Guests on the day of the wedding were just family members and a few best friends- all fit on a long makeshift table in our living room. The food was potluck, including the wedding cake, which my mother made. My father paid for a case of beer and a couple of bottles of wine. The marriage fee was probably around $200.
(My divorce was more expensive and cost me $3000 for the mediator lawyer plus half of everything I owned.)
My in-laws got drunk and were the last ones to leave, while complaining for the last half an hour that they had to go in front of the door to smoke ( it was February). Pictures were taken by an ( unpaid) friend just during the evening, so they were not perfect.
Next day, we took the bus to Austria for our honeymoon with cross country skiing.
 
We didn’t have a church service, but we also had a ceremony we had made up ourselves which we held during an evening shattered with friends. Honestly, I don’t remember the details that much, we had some kind of vows and some readings from us and from friends and a meal. It felt meaningful at that time. A good friend of mine had come all the way from New York, which was one highlight of the event.
 
Fairly traditional. A church ceremony and hotel reception. Not frugal, but we didn't go into debt for the wedding either.
If I were to have a 2nd wedding I wouldn't do the same thing. If I were to go back in time though, I would do the same thing but with changing a few details of things that didn't go as planned. Like the cake that we spent a fair bit of money on was lopsided. The person I hired to do linens actually added texture to the table so it wasn't as noticeable, it's great to have people who will go and do extra things for the unexpected - when it's not even their problem. The cake at least tasted really good.
 
Mine was fairly casual. Got married by a UU minister, wrote our own vows. I wore an off-white silk shift (knee length) with a rather fabulous hat and a very expensive pair of shoes. We got married at the pioneer church at our local County Museum (where my Dad worked part-time at the time). There were about 25 people at the wedding - immediate family and a few close friends. Our younger siblings signed the register for us. We then repaired to a local hall-for-hire (which in a curious twist of fate is now the local mosque) where we had supper, that I catered myself, (including the wedding cake, which a friend decorated for me), and then we had a party for about 75 people. Cash bar, tunes provided by a succession of mix tapes provided by a friend. Including the shoes, I don't think we spent more than $800 for the whole thing. My sister made up the name cards for the dinner, etc. My sister-in-law is a good photographer, so we had some nice photos. My god-parents put us up in Barrie's fanciest motel for our wedding night, then we went to Parry Sound to a cottage to go fishing for a week.

And yeah, my divorce cost a lot more. Worth it to hire a canny lawyer who kept my ex's fingers out of my pension.

I cannot imagine getting married again, but were some miracle to happen that this should occur, I think I'd have a quiet religious ceremony at my own church officiated by my minister, then maybe repair to a local pub for a meal.
 
It was lovely and I don't want to talk about the special details. It was a beautiful tight budget wedding - considering our budget it was amazing. I wouldn't change a thing except set strong boundaries for my mother to behave - and remember to buy string lights for the garden patio/ smoking area so people could see better out there. Seriously, the fact that I didn't remember that still bugs me when I've since seen interesting patio string lights in stores. My real regret is about points in the marriage that could've been different. My mom was awful right out of the gate.
 
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Actually...I wish we'd eloped and had a minister or justice of the peace at the place where we had the reception - with just our friends. My parents fought over my wedding but didn't care about our marriage. Maybe we should've left them out of it. But then my grandparents would not have been there, and I'm glad they were. They were happy and it was the last time I saw them together.

I'm still married but separated and I don't know if I'll ever bother/ want to divorce. That was it for me. I'm done. I asked my husband to mail me a simple bit of paperwork months ago and he hasn't even done that yet. He left, took off for what he hoped were greener pastures but weren't, turned my life upside down in the process, but can't even help with the divorce...so it doesn't matter. I'm not marrying again anyway.
 
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Our wedding was small. . . 30 people in total, IIFC.

We were married in my grandmother's United Church. The reception was dinner in a restaurant followed by drinks at my parents' place. We honeymooned in Niagara-on-the-Lake and returned to work a few days later. All lovely and low key.

The biggest glitch was my husband giving his grandfather the boutonniere that was intended for the groom.

Also it rained. But I was assured that in Irish tradition, rain on a wedding day means good luck.

Would I do anything differently? Maybe expand the guest list a little.
 
We had a church wedding...at the small country church I attended regularly, and it was just at the end of our driveway. So, of course, my bridesmaids and I walked to and from the church. It was quite packed...people had to sit in the annex of the church. My husband comes from a big family, and everyone showed up, which was nice. We had a big reception...good food and fun dancing. There were a couple of little hiccups that I don't want to re-live, so I won't talk about them. But this is something that meant a lot to me: Our florist wasn't overly helpful in getting nice flowers. But two ladies from the church raided their gardens and the fields and decorated the church with a lovely selection of wild and garden flowers. It meant a lot to me!
 
Fairly traditional service at my family church conducted by the minister I had helped find. Lots of help from Mom, who was the church secretary, since neither of us actually lived in the city where the church was located. Followed by photos in Rockway Gardens (the traditional spot for wedding photos in Kitchener at the time) and a reception in the social club of a condo complex in Waterloo. Less than 50 in attendance, mostly from my side. Mrs. M had some friends and few relatives by marriage who live in the US. Readings were 1 Cor 13 and a Chinese love poem, both done in both English and Mandarin. Would have been nice if her parents could have come over but they came a couple years later and we took them around the province. Probably better than if we had been dealing with a wedding and then going on a honeymoon.
 
Anybody knows of “ unusual” wedding traditions?

In Germany, people often have a “ Polterabend”. Meaning a “ Noise -Evening”- before the wedding. Friends and colleagues are coming , its a casual event and might just involve snacks and beer, but everyone brings a plate or something made of porcelain and smashes it at the front door ( there would be a cardboard padded area set up), to shew away the “ bad ghosts”, while the bride and groom have to sweep the broken pieces into a pile for “good luck”. Smashing glass is bad luck, so never bring glass. ( funny how that is opposite to jewish tradition)

Another thing that could happen is that the bride gets abducted by friends during the evening who take her to different bars and wrap up a bill, while the groom has to follow and pay the bills. I think, this probably only happens , if it still does, in rural areas where the bars are fewer and in walking distance.
 
Anybody knows of “ unusual” wedding traditions?

In Germany, people often have a “ Polterabend”. Meaning a “ Noise -Evening”- before the wedding. Friends and colleagues are coming , its a casual event and might just involve snacks and beer, but everyone brings a plate or something made of porcelain and smashes it at the front door ( there would be a cardboard padded area set up), to shew away the “ bad ghosts”, while the bride and groom have to sweep the broken pieces into a pile for “good luck”. Smashing glass is bad luck, so never bring glass. ( funny how that is opposite to jewish tradition)

Another thing that could happen is that the bride gets abducted by friends during the evening who take her to different bars and wrap up a bill, while the groom has to follow and pay the bills. I think, this probably only happens , if it still does, in rural areas where the bars are fewer and in walking distance.
The mean people bring a whole toilet to smash.
 
In Turkey and Serbia, anybody who blocks the way of the bride and groom (to the church), has to be paid by the groom to get through. So the groom has to make sure to have some cash in his pockets.
 
You know wedded bliss is going to cost yah ... thus the sacrifice item ... gone off into the blue? Out of here or over the rainbow?
 
Our wedding was a happy occasion. If I had to do it again I would probably take away a camera from my best man on the morning of. I look a bit too relaxed in one photo and it has been an item of some contention ever since.

We tried renewing our vows for our 25th anniversary but every plan we made to do that unraveled. Maybe for our 30th anniversary.

My side of the party was so relaxed and enjoying ourselves that we were rushed to arrive on-time.

The most hilarious out-takes from the event.

My best man, infinitely frustrated by my inability to brush my own hair correctly visits the bridal party, borrows a brush comes back and brushes my hair for me.

Most hilarious out-take from the ceremony. The minister who knew both Kimberly and myself shares the impact I had upon him and his whole family. It is a moving tribute. When he begins to talk about Kimberly he says her name. Pauses. Sighs (overly long and overly loud) before pausing again. Knowing laughter from those assembled. Then he does say some nice things about her.

Video evidence shows a bride fighting a nearly losing battle to contain herself during the service.

I look quite subdued and not at all afraid for my life.
 
We tried renewing our vows for our 25th anniversary

I thought about it but our anniversary is also usually our travel time since it falls between semesters. We ended up spending it in Great Smokey Mountain National Park.
 
Our wedding was a low key happy celebration on a VERY hot & humid day in early June! The weather changed the plans a bit, as neither the chapel nor the golf club where we had the reception had air-conditioning. Mainly family and a couple of insistent friends at the ceremony with many others joining us for the reception; officiant was a UU minister who did a so-so job of it, beads of sweat dripping down his face. Friends played harpiscord & flute music which was very special. Only one welcome speech by my Dad, no toasts, no glass clinking - that we insisted upon. My dress was a beautiful robins egg blue French chiffon which I loved. My husband wore a beautiful beige tweed Pierre Balmain suit.

During the reception there were various times I looked around for my husband ... couldn't see him; then he'd pop up later. I asked where he had been - well, he and a few friends had gone off in the Mercedes he'd rented for the weekend - it had good air conditionning & they needed to cool off!! We had a great trio playing dance music - but nobody was dancing - way too hot! Everyone was outside on the patio, enjoying any breeze that wafted by. All that topped off by a night at the nearby Holiday Inn - did I mention there was a baseball tournement in town & most of the players were also staying there? Noisy!! So memorable, but maybe not for the anticipated reasons! Good thing we'd already been living together for a few years so 'the lost magic' of the night was okay.
 
We had a very simple ceremony at our local Anglican Church, with only family members around. With our parents, sisters, brothers, their children and the two living grandmothers, we had 30 guests, including... 5 on my side of the family. No reception afterwards.

If I were to redo it today, it would be fairly similar. Although I once heard of a couple getting married during the regular Sunday Eucharist. That could be nice...
 
As my husband had been married previously, he wanted a non-church wedding with a marriage celebrant. We had been living together happily for ten years, but when his father died, and his eldest daughter had a son, we agreed that it probably was a good idea to marry. (As I said at the time, "it's one thing to be an unmarried mother, but quite another to be an unmarried grandmother!")
We had a lovely wedding in my sister's garden and a catered meal on her deck -with a few close friends and our families. The man next door decided to cut his lawn in the middle of our vows - which caused much hilarity as he was competing with some currawongs chortling a musical accompaniment.

I spent a lot of time writing out the service - I remember having Kahlil Gibran's "On Marriage" read out.

My two sisters - knowing that their eldest sister is "different" were concerned that - one week out - I hadn't given any thought to what I would wear -which, according to them, is what brides do!
My youngest sister insisted on taking me shopping....... with the result that whenever I look at my wedding photos I sometimes think my husband married my sister! :giggle:
 
We married in December. In London. Snow belt. Friday evening it started to snow. By Saturday morning 25 inches had come down ( married before metric). Yikes

but all was good. Some guests didn’t make the church but did get to the reception

unexpected event? Friends of my in laws brought two uninvited teenager kids. In hind site, I now know that culturally it is just an expectation that kids are invited. But none of us thought to be specific. To me the invitation addressed to mr and mrs was specific enough

luckily because of the blizzard a few people didn’t make it so we had seats and dinners for them

if I did it again, I would get different dresses for my bridesmaids. i would give my own speech thanking my parents
 
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